Wandering.
Alone.
Under a dark cloud.
Just going through the motions.
All of this and more is what has been going on in my mind these last few weeks.
I haven't posted in a while and this is probably why.
I have so much running around in my head and posting it doesn't always seem like a great thing to do.
Lately, my thoughts are jumbled. I don't feel like my thoughts make sense and by the time that they start to make sense, I don't have time to write it all down.
When everything happened, a nurse told me that journaling might be a good thing to do. Immediately, I thought that was such a great idea so that I woundn't forget our precious little girl.
Since then, I have gone back and forth whether I want everything I am thinking out in the open or if I want to keep it hidden, tucked away for no one else to see.
We have small groups at church and over the last few years we have learned that people need people and it is good to be accountable to others so that we stay on the right path.
I agree with that and know that even though it isn't always easy to let others in and share the things that mean the most to you, it is usually very helpful. Not only for the person with the thoughts, but also for others that might be going through a similar struggle or temptation.
So, with all that said, I am going to do my best and share my thoughts, fears, struggles, and whatever other emotions I might be dealing with throughout this whole healing process.
How long is this healing process?
I am guessing that it may last for quite a while so you will have to just bare with me through it all.
If I haven't posted in a while and you are curious as to how things are going, please feel free to email me or send me a comment to ask how I am doing.
I guess I am saying that I am allowing you to keep me accountable so that I stay on the "right" track and stay away from any temptation or sin that occurs with a loss like this.
I know everything is still fresh and new and I am at the beginning of this healing. My body isn't even completely healed yet but I know and rest in the comfort that MY GOD IS GOOD and he will continue to carry me through this day by day, minute by minute, moment by moment.
"HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR ME!"
Stay Cool This Summer In Chambray
7 years ago
1 comment:
I'm here if you need anything Aim.
One of the hardest things, I think, is to feel like people have forgotten. No one says much after awhile, and it seems like everyone has moved on. Everyone except you, obviously, because this is YOUR situation.
But, just know that, even though people may not be mentioning Lilliana as much these days, there are many who are still thinking of you and praying for your healing everyday.
Grief is different for everyone, and each person handles it differently. Internally, externally....whatever.
There is no right or wrong.
But, like you said: the most important thing to remember is that His grace IS sufficient. That doesn't mean it is easy. It just means He will carry you through. Everything.
If you need to talk, I am here. If I can do anything, please let me know.
Love you, talk to you soon.
Post a Comment